I know that this post is going to set off the usual round of screamers, bring it!
I desperately “prayed the gay away”, I wanted to rid myself of the demons (thoughts) that consumed me. No one would willingly subject themselves to a lifestyle of social condemnation. This after a battle with friends and most definitely family who were less than accepting of my “in the closet lifestyle.”
Now I know where my parents failed. They didn’t want me to be a gay and asked me if I could simply be asexual. Not involved with anyone.
What they really wanted me to do was pray. Read the Bible. Study
scripture. Find God and embrace him. They often reminded me of, Leviticus. Chapter 18, Verse 20, to be exact: “You shall not lie with a male as with a woman; it is an abomination.”
Christians respond to the challenge of homosexuality:
“Repent.” When they get no results, they chalk it up to the homosexual’s unwillingness to make the right “choice.”
The US Catholic bishops, whose view is pretty much, take up your cross and suffer in celibacy. You must use your moral courage to live it out.
Then you’ve got my Pentecostal brothers and sisters. They’ll slap you on the forehead and proclaim you healed, then usher you back to your seat to the beat of a thumping gospel tune. Funny, hardly anyone ever asks anymore if your healing has actually manifested. They don’t ask, because they don’t want to know.
I wonder if any of this has worked for Ted Haggard? I mean, it didn’t help him being the head of a ministry, but maybe all those men on their knees at the alter were too much pressure?
If a bunch of Christian fundamentalists want to believe that you can deny sexual feelings by immersing yourself in prayer, then I applaud them. Personally, I don’t see the point but I am not going to condemn them.
I have to admit that it really gets me fired up when the faith based community don’t think about what kind of shame they are filling these young people with. Do they take responsibility for the attempted suicides and successful suicides of young LGBT youth? I believe that there are other behaviors happening in the world that deserve far more prayer and attention than someone’s sexuality and dating preference.
My only conclusion is this. While the debate on whether this is a learned trait or that which is innate, the cure for the common homosexual isn’t going to be prayed away for the mass majority. If a person has a commitment and special dedication to want to suppress these feelings and feels that a deeper connection to God will do this, it is only a testimate to the power the Church has in people’s lives.
For all others, it’s a constant journey and the ultimate decision lies within. But while suppressing who you are to help you move freely throughout the church, I doubt it will do much for your soul and spiritual journey to keep up the facade.
I’m old enough now to laugh off ridiculous, illegitimate studies done by people trying to prove their own point. I read the fine print, see the methodology used. Every time I read one of these studies, I vow to be as out, as available and as open of a role model as I can possibly be.
Advocate Guy
The Catholic Church does not teach that homosexuality is a sin. It is a sin when it is acted out. As for your idea that Religion’s disapproval of homosexuality brings shame, that is not true.
If Gay people are so “proud” of what they claim to be, why are many killing themselves? Why the guilt? Protestants, Muslims, Pro Abortion and Gay supporters as well as Atheists call me every name in the book, yet I am still here. I am not ashamed of being a Catholic.
@Sacerdotus – I grew up in the Catholic bible belt with very religious family and friends. In response to your statement, “The Catholic Church does not teach that homosexuality is a sin.” “It is a sin when it is acted out.” The catholic church/religion does teach that impure thoughts having to do with anything about being gay equates to SIN. And your next statement.“If Gay people are so “proud” of what they claim to be, why are many killing themselves? Why the guilt?” WoW, are you really going to take that stance? Your statement about you being bullied “they call me every name in the book, yet I am still here.” It does not sound like you were bullied it sounds like people were/are refuting your statements, big difference. This does not compare to how gays are bullied, severely beaten, taunted, condemned and murder, EVEN if they make every effort to conform to the heterosexual life style. On your twitter account you call yourself a “persist in training” but yet on twitter and your personal faith based blog I see you casting stones. It’s obvious you are hiding behind god with your ignorance and so called faith. You just don’t see how severe your ignorance is because you filter everything through the homophobic lense. It’s disturbing how you can cherry pick from YOUR bible. What you failed to mention is that YOUR bible YOUR faith also states “Intercultural – Interracial Marriage Relationships” are forbidden but it happens often within people of your faith. I suspect it’s because they realize how ridiculous it is so they “choose” to utilize there legel right to marry whom they wish. Common-law marriage, cohabitation, and divorce are a sin according to YOUR bible and YOUR faith but it’s legal and MILLIONS (people within your own faith) are “choosing” to exercise their rights. How about scripture Deuteronomy 22:5 “Woman shall not wear that which “pertaineth unto man.” I see women within YOUR faith wearing pants all the time and isn’t that “pertaineth unto men.” I want to leave you with one last scripture form YOUR bible to think about. Luke 6:37 ESV “Judge not, and you will not be judged; condemn not, and you will not be condemned; forgive, and you will be forgiven. I am pretty sure with your response and point of view you are going to HELL according to your bible/faith/beliefs. Looks like YOU have a lot to worry about rather than casting stones. I could go on-and-on about what your bible/faith states. Rather then do that I am going to pray for you because the FACTS show that your God/faith is very disappointed with you. Thank you, to my faith, Jesus, God that he accepts me for who I am. An open mind will set you free!
Let them think what they like. I’ll live as I please. I say gay the pray away.
Wow! That’s a really neat answer!
That’s right. The fact that they disapprove of what we do fills us with shame. And we have a right not to feel shame. That proves that they have the right to STFU. That’s right. Our right not to feel shame trumps their right to free speech or free exercise of religion. It’s all about not feeling shame.
I really want to feel good about my sexuality and who I am, but they just won’t let me. So let’s shame them.
Oh, and I am adding this blog to my blogroll. You should see some traffic from mine to yours.
http://twogaybullies.wordpress.com/
Thanks for shranig. Always good to find a real expert.
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